Friendship….. Destined!!

Meenakshi Malthane
6 min readMar 9, 2021

Friendship is the only relationship that we choose consciously for ourselves. Some people are meant to come into our lives and to whom we are attracted due to our energies…they are said to be destined!!

Feb 2006 was a life-changing year for me, as I moved from India to Uk. New country, new culture, new people and new to English Weather, of course!! when we say I am more adaptable and more flexible than others but we don't know if that really is true, till we actually put that into practice.

Anyways, Weather can be a big factor to change your way of living. you may feel dizzy and sleepy most of the time in cold countries as you come from a tropical high-temperature region. To start finding a job was tuff and unknown. Making new friends and getting used to these life changes took some time and effort for me. But soon I decided to join a training course in web development and got busy, a year pass. As we were staying in a shared home, I met some new friends, Amar Manche as the same age as me and working for an IT company from India. Of course, this was all new to him but with me around he was comfortable.

Amar knew one of his college friends who lived in east London and he planned to visit our place. Nishant arrived with his grand entry style….

“Hi, I am Nishant Shinde. Howz you?”. I smiled and said “fine.” He was quick to settle in, he introduces himself and was keen to know more about me. we all happen to be of the same age, this took all of us by surprise!

Nishant Shinde

He recently purchased a car, which he was very eager to show off and he wanted me to join them, for a ride. I was a little unsure but he convinces me. “Join us you will be fine, you will get used to the city lifestyle”. I agreed. His most common statement — “ Don’t worry, come on, you can come. Aga chal ga!! He was a very outgoing and extroverted person. He was alone in Uk away from his family that was in thane, Mumbai.

He was super active. He felt very open-minded and free-spirited. Young, good career, and well settled. He regularly visited us and we enjoyed his company. Even my husband was impressed with his intellectual knowledge of all things and skills. of course, he loved Umesh food, so the visits increased a lot. Also, he was single and ready to mingle….

Once he suggested we should go to Essex and Bournemouth to one of his friend's places for a Bank holiday. Umesh was working on weekends and I was not sure If I can go with these guys I hardly knew them for the last 2 months. But I was super bored at home so I decided I should not worry much and just go. So It was like 3 idiots movie we 3 backpack our bags and went on a vacation. And look at me — just a few months married and going with 2 guys in an unknown country. Sometimes we just have to follow our own intuition. The trip was hilarious we enjoy it a lot. One of his friends we visit was caught by surprise and they were newly married and we just interrupted their honeymoon weekend….ahhha that was seriously funny.

We all

I have traveled mostly with him up till now. And all his trips organized were awesome. Even a tent camping, we did was a great sense of joy in nature.

we develop a deep friendship and we kept meeting and sharing our thoughts and experiences. Nishant got married and got busy in his married life. We met few times but not that often. After a few years, we got to know from one of our friends that he got divorced. It was shocking because he was so perfect and full of energy. we even went for this new home ceremony just 2 years after his marriage. Life changes so fast that we don’t know why certain things happen. Probably he was more open to free-spirited or unopen to love matters. Sometimes we are scared to love our own self. And find it difficult to accept others' way of love. If you are too much good in the outside world but find it hard to reach out for help or in understanding near and dear ones those who are too close. In the end, we are all humans.

He was the same for me. Nishant the genius. Always ready to help and understand and overexciting for each and everything. He calculated all his moves or perfectly planned life. we had our fights but the balance friendship thread ran deep down unseen.

He was strong when he lost his job during the 2008 recession at the leaman brothers. He joined Norman soon in a few month's time. He was the only son so his mother insisted to shift to Mumbai with them and start a new life. He joined JP Morgan in Mumbai. We did talk few times but couldn’t see each other much. 2016 and 2017 we wish to meet up in India during the school holidays but our busy schedule made up missed that opportunity. In August 2018 when I was about to travel to India, Umesh plans to meet up with Amar and Nishant.

And that time I got this shocking news. I couldn’t believe that, and I felt helpless or lifeless. I felt I have to see Nishant as soon as possible as he had less time. I got a flashback of the time we spend together. I travel to Mumbai to see my parents. Soon I and Umesh decided to see Nishant. He saw him at Amar’s place. Amar had just got a new home in Thane. Nishant had lost his hairs, he was a bit week but the smile and energy remain the same. He had pancreatic cancer. And he has less time. We all were broken but when we looked at him, he was super strong and ready to fight. That courage was unmeasurable. And the knowledge he had gained about and around the disease and how to handle it and work around it was very well planned. Still even to think in that direction was so scary for me. I may die soon if the chemotherapy fails. This thought is really frightening.

Why this happen to him was a mystery, always well-read, planned, and informed. Living the best of lifestyle. What was unfulfilled and hidden in life, beneath the skin. why the hidden emotional traumas were so strong that they affected the organs. How to address these unseen issues? We as humans try to control our life and forget to surrender to the universe or the higher power.

He gave a brave fight till Dec 2020. He was finally freed on 14th Dec2020. Free of painful life. This news was very shattering but his smiling face kept saying to me, I am still there with you. One day for sure I will see him again probably me 60 years + and he still the same 20 years of age full of energy.

The energies level matched they cannot be separated. We find them in time and space. I wish him a happy life ahead as he lived this one….always smiling and happy. Even when he was full of pain inside.